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If These Walls Could Talk

dennis quaid bathroom

Source: AD

JANET: Okay, so what do we have here?
JOY: This, my dear, is Dennis Quaid’s bathroom.
JANET: Hm, I have to say right off the bat, it doesn’t look sooo bad...
JOY: Well, I suppose. Until you start looking at scale.
JANET: I guess…that teeny tiny table and that massive mirror seem to be a bit off.
JOY: And I just hope that the neighbors can’t see in that window!
JANET: You mean the window-slash-mirror?
JOY: Yeah, whatever. Seriously, this entire room looks like it was put together just for this photo shoot – and rather badly, I might add.
Janet: I think the stylist called in sick that day.
JOY: So true- where is the requisite softness? The fluffy textiles? The warm glow of the candles that should be lit. I mean that’s just styling 101 stuff!
JANET: And have you looked at those sconces? Could they be any smaller?
JOY: I dunno, Chandler. I am perhaps not as concerned with the sconces as I should be, because I can’t seem to tear my eyes away from the SCRUNCHIES.
JANET: I count five. Five scrunchies. Ha. Ha. Ha.
JOY: But the question is, why is the corner of Dennis Quaid’s vanity sticking so obtrusively into the photo?
JANET: You wanna know what I think? I think Dennis sent in the photo himself. "Hey Architectural Digest, can you feature my fabulous luxurious bathroom? I’m having a bit of a publicity lull just now…"
JOY: Some people will do anything for attention.


  1. WORMS! There are WORMS hanging from the ceiling!

    Ew ew ew!

  2. Bad, bad scrunchies...
    Those lights are a bit freaky. A bit exotic perhaps, in a not so exotic setting?

  3. Not lovin' the scrunchies, either. You girls crack me up!

  4. Ya, the scrunchies are bad news bears!


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